Sometime, you may find yourself in the web of thoughts. At that time, you would be feeling confused to take a definite course of action to solve a problem and remain undecided for a long period. You feel unable to work out your confidence whether a particular action if you take would be successful or not. You need to restore your confidence in such circumstances. Let’s search out the way how to do it.
You very well understand that your mindset is divided into two regions – you may call them as the Conscious Part and Subconscious Part. Both parts continuously interact with each other and effect your perceptions and decision making process emphatically. The both parts play important roles in framing your mindset in their individual capacities.
Your memories and emotional factors are unknowingly housed in your subconscious part. That collection is so powerful that whatever you think subconsciously, you become like that. If you tend to think that you can win the battle, that you can succeed in the interview, that you can achieve good marks in your examination or that you can come over some emerging problem, and if such positive thinking is made up in your mind before you attempt, be sure that you can do the same and for doing so, you will put in your best. If you start to work on some negative tone, you won’t be able to get the target whatever the amount of your efforts may be there. With negative thinking at the start, you may not achieve and if you achieve, the achievement may not be so glaring one.
For restoration of confidence, you need to understand your own mind and make changes in your attitude to think more positively. To do it more methodically, the following attempts can be undertaken by you:
- You may consider finding out why you feel weak to counter a challenge, why you are not loved by someone or all, why you do not get what you deserve or why you do not deserve to get that particular status/matter, etc. you may find out the origin of such thinking and challenge the validity. Sometime, you develop some inferior complex in your mind due to an unwarranted emotional attachment to your name and form, to result into distorted perceptions. you must check the accuracy of your perceptions. You may list the people who do love you; remind yourself of the instances when you have been successful in achieving something – the target might be getting someone smile on any ground, or preparing a delicious meal or making an appreciable presentation in the office.
- You may maintain a record of your thoughts depreciating your worth. You have to look at them objectively and mark them as black if your perception has been distorted by your emotions only; white –if they are genuine. For example if the recent appraisal at office grades your performance in the last quarter as average, you should look at your reactions. Do you tend to blame your boss or wife as the cause of such grading? This victimizing mentality hampers growth. Instead, you should take over complete responsibility and search for causes within your thinking framework if they are negative, delaying behavior and fears of failure which have given negative approach of the creator within (subconscious mind) and restrained the process of your success.
- You may undertake Ānāpānasati (meditative concentration) for five minutes only regularly to groom up your mind to quickly switch from a particular frequency to another. This is best done just before sleeping. You may observe the slow and rhythmic rise and fall of your abdomen and count sheep backwards from 25-0. This will get you to the alpha level where your subconscious is most amenable to suggestions.
- When you reach this stage, mentally to repeat a positive affirmation of self worth, such as, ‘You love and honor yourself. You are confident of success and happiness in your life, as you do your best and let go of the rest’.
- You would take your actions in the waking state in accordance to your positive inclinations with integral effort of thought, word and deed.
- Sometimes your feeling may come forth in indirect forms as a feeling of anger with others, irritation, incapacitating self pity or grief. The trick with feelings as opposed to thoughts is to sit down alone when You are in the throes of the feeling and look at the feeling itself. If this makes you cry or you want to punch your pillow, that’s fine too. After some such sessions you will realize how ridiculous all this is.
- You should tell yourself that the whole world is suffering. Even people who appear prosperous and trouble free, have some suffering or the other. You are not special. You need to cultivate empathy and compassion for others.
- You should sit in a quiet, peaceful place with your eyes closed to visualize yourself open up to the light of divine grace, like a flower blossoms to receive the warm, life giving rays of the sun. You need to be receptive to the healing of the transformational capacity of divine grace.
- You should adopt practice giving to others without any motive. You may give encouragement, motivation, a smile, a glass of water, time, money and energy. When you give and share, your own blessings multiply.
- You should not be preoccupied with results. Now that you have acted from your highest level, you will trust life!