Permission to Be – You, are you first before Marriage or Friendship

Permission to Be – You, are you first before Marriage or Friendship : Hello there, I hope you have had a great ride so far in 2023. Have you permitted yourself to be so far? Let us explore this together!

Have you ever acted or deliberated on a matter based on how someone or some others will react? Or craved for response from others, and this then guides your behavior? Posted something just to get many likes or comments? Aha, if you answered no, you are a rare breed…

Sometimes, I do not give myself enough permission just to be! We are created to seek connection and attention and to care what others may or may not think. That in itself is ok…but how it drives our behavior and our whole thought pattern, is what I am zooming in on here!

Did you buy a particular car or something just for you, or do you wish others would notice it too? We do sometimes give others too much permission to affect us and our behavior. Have you ever had a chat with someone and wondered why they are desperately trying to portray a certain image? Whether they are conscious of it, it is pretty sad to witness. Pay attention next time and you will realize that a lot of hurt felt by people in communication or interaction stems from one insisting on giving a particular ‘image’. For what and why? If we would each truly be ourselves, much hurt would be eliminated.

At our core, we are good and who we each are is unique and with depth that affects, embraces, and compliments the rest of us all.

I would like to challenge you and I. How much permission do you give you to be….to be human, to be learning, to be growing, to just be you, with all the good and the not-so-good that you are working on?…let us do this together! I will give myself permission to be, feel, and do many things – will you? For example:

  • I will give myself the permission to feel…
  • I will give myself the permission to love…
  • I will give myself the permission to accept love from the amazing people planted around me…
  • I will give myself the permission to speak…and to be quiet…and everything in between!
  • I will give myself the permission to walk away from things that do not serve me.
  • I will give myself the permission to stay with things that help me.

Don’t relinquish power to anyone else… permission is yours to give to you,,,no one else has that power over you…

Give yourself permission to be the judge of your own situation, and do it gently and kindly and with love.

Allow yourself to cope with challenges in your life in the manner that ONLY YOU can. Who says there is just one right way to be? So the marriage is difficult and you are still clinging on, that is you, just do it your way! Or it’s too difficult, so you moved out – excellent for you for giving yourself permission. Simply be!

For you and your partner, remember to give you permission to be and stop spending too much time and effort on what he or she is doing and not doing! This is the first trick to actually saving a broken relationship! Take charge of you! Just Be!

Give yourself the permission to see yourself, hear you, and touch you. Whenever you are spending too much time imagining what is happening in another person’s mind and especially related to you, you are giving yourself permission to discount you and you have quit being you, and becoming someone and something else that you are not!

Do not be deceived, people try hard these days to portray some specific images. It is quite sad to watch and see the emptiness in it!

I give myself permission to share me – in my totality, and I demand that from anyone that wants to enter my zone.

This means, you will not hear about my troubles if my success annoys you. Neither will you share in my joys when you are not there on rainy days…I give me permission to take myself seriously.

See, I give myself permission to just be me….that sieves people in and others out naturally….because only the true ones will be able to stay – when you are you.

Ideally, we don’t need permission to be ourselves, but sometimes, especially in challenging seasons in life, we neglect our role in loving ourselves first and therefore, let me introduce you to – Permission to be….

All you need in the face of criticism, judgment, isolation, exhaustion, fear, or any other bad emotion is love, and the first love you need is to love yourself. Don’t forget to let yourself be the one for you!

May these words come to life in you and for you!

Thank you for reading! Thank you for sharing!

Love and life to you!!!




Claire Afua Jørgensen, is based in Denmark, married and with two kids. She is an NLP Practitioner and a Christian Marriage Coach. She is currently immersed in the pursuit of a Ph.D. in Neuroscience, Psychology, and Faith. Over the past few years, she has worked with countless couples and individuals, with a special focus on women whose marriages have veered toward the brink of divorce. In her capacity as a coach, she has devoted her energy and expertise to guiding and helping them Save their Marriage.

She offers a variety of services, including one-on-one coaching sessions, group coaching, and transformative retreats, tailored to meet the unique needs of individuals and couples facing difficult challenges in marriage.

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Permission to Be – You, are you first before Marriage or Friendship

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