Nothing can kill your sex buzz like being all caught up in the moment with a totally revved engine when the guy orgasms, putting the kibosh on one of the most fun ways to get your heartrate up. It’s an unfortunate fact of nature that women usually take a leisurely path to orgasm while guys often opt for the shortest route possible, but that doesn’t mean you can’t do anything about it. These endurance-boosters will help ensure you both have enough time to reach orgasm, then cuddle together and bask in the glow of feel-good hormones.
1. Add Pumpkin to Your Grocery List
Here’s a reason to get your guy addicted to the gourd: “Many people don’t know that there’s research that says pumpkin boost men’s libido,” says Ava Cadell, Ph.D., author of Neuroloveology and the Sexual Health Expo’s 2015 sexpert of the year. “Pumpkin seeds get the blood flowing 40 percent faster to the male genitals and boost sex drive in general,” says Cadell. Even though they’re delicious straight-up or in a sweet and spicy recipe, Cadell says treats that have pumpkin—even cake and pie—can also do the trick.
2. Pull His Testicles
Not hard, obviously! You don’t want to hurt the guy. What you do want to do is prevent the semen from traveling through his testicles, into his shaft and out of his urethra. “When a man is about to ejaculate, his testicles rise, and soon he’ll be at the point of no return,” says Cadell. “If you want him to last longer, then you want to pull his testicles down toward his feet.” That puts you in the driver’s seat so you can let go when you’re ready for him to, well, let go. As a bonus, you can put this one to work whether you’re having sex, giving a blow job, or trying your hand at a handie.
3. Switch It Up
While it’s rare for a guy to absolutely hate any one sex position, most men have their favorites that can bring them to orgasm in a nanosecond. “I would say doggy is the most popular position men like to orgasm in,” says Cadell. “One thing to do is go through other positions instead of just doing that one.” She recommends trying out something like this: Start in missionary, move to scissors, get on top, work on your spooning, then finally transition into doggy. He’ll last much longer than if you start off in doggy from the get-go, but of course you can change up the routine based on both of your preferences. To figure out when you should move things along, pay attention to his physical cues. “When a man is about to come, he breathes much faster,” says Cadell. “As soon as his breath starts to pick up, then you want to change positions.”
4. Get a Pleasure Ring
As far as sex toys go, a pleasure ring is a low-key addition to your bedside drawer. “It’s a flexible ring that stretches to any man’s size,” says Cadell. “You put it at the base of the penis, and it helps him stay harder longer because it traps the blood in his shaft.” These toys were specifically designed to boost a man’s endurance, but he doesn’t have to know that’s why you got it. “Some brands like Screaming O have pleasure rings that have vibrators on top to stimulate the clitoris,” says Cadell. That way, you can just bring it out as something to help you orgasm. Pro tip: The type that has a ring on both top and bottom might overstimulate him, exacerbating the problem.
5. Turn Kegels into a Game
“We all need to exercise every day, but many men don’t realize they need to exercise their penises just like they do their biceps or quadriceps,” says Cadell. That’s where you come in. When your guy is standing and has an erection, drape a mini towel over his penis. Tell him that if he lifts his penis 20 times (or 10 if he’s a total beginner), he can have you in whichever position he wants. Once he’s completed those, move the towel just over the head of his penis, and throw another incentive in there if he can crank out 20 more reps. “Sexercise in the form of kegels strengthens a man’s pelvic floor and can result in longer-lasting erections and even help with premature ejaculation,” says Cadell. Try to work them into the plan at least once a week to see (and feel!) the results.
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