Managing Codependency: Know the Signs : If you’re feeling exhausted of catering to your partner’s needs while recovery, or finding it challenging to understand their addiction and thus, feeling trapped in the relationship, it means that you’re in a codependent relationship. Codependency occurs when one individual is focused on taking care of their alcoholic or drug-addicted partners. It is true that addicts require constant care and special attention to help them recover and avoid relapses.
However, individuals take care of partners with addiction find themselves making most sacrifices in the relationship and getting nothing in return. These are signs that your codependent relationship must be identified and dealt with, for the benefit of both your partner and you.
An article from Asana Recovery explains what codependency is and the telltale signs to know when you’re in a codependent relationship. Codependency is never healthy and therefore, Asana Recovery advises you to find professional counseling for the right support and guidance.
Problems when you say ‘No’
Codependant partners will often find it difficult to say ‘No’ and will be unable to reject ideas that they’re uncomfortable with. Problems of anxiety and relationship issues weigh them down from doing something that they do not like, which further creates problems in a codependent relationship.
Putting oneself ahead of the other
While it is important that partners take care of each other, codependency is when one partner ends up sacrificing way too much and spending all their energy into taking care of the other. This happens when people in relationships with alcoholics or drug addicts consistently try to provide care and fix their problems, regardless of whether their advice is being taken seriously or not.
Living in denial
Denial to seek help or counseling is one of the gravest signs of codependency. When focussing excessively on other’s needs and feelings becomes paramount in a relationship, such individuals start denying the fact that they are also in need of love and support for holding their confidence and self-esteem. Codependent couples will deny that they are facing problems, and therefore, will avoid relying on professional guidance to manage their relationships.
Miscommunication and misunderstandings
Communication is a huge challenge in codependent relationships. Because of the control boundaries and limitations that exist in codependency, partners may find it difficult to communicate effectively. Owing to constant denial and rejection of feelings from alcohol and drug addicts, it becomes all the more difficult to convey the right message across, leading to bigger and complex problems in codependent relationships.
Obsessing over relationships and mistakes
It is very easy for codependent partners to start obsessing over ideal relationships and other couples, simply to deal with the pain they’re going through. While it is good to consider your fears and anxiety, obsession can be disastrous for a relationship and may also limit the way you enjoy your life and spend time with your loved ones.
Intimacy issues
It is natural that co-dependents find it difficult to enjoy a sexually active or intimate life with each other. Considering the amount of control, boundaries, and one-sided affection that codependency creates, partners in such relationships may be unable to seek intimacy, and may also result in sexual dysfunctions.
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Codependency: When Relationships Become Everything
Love Addiction and Codependency
Codependency: What It Is, What It Feels Like
What is Codependency? – Are you Codependent?
Love Lessons: A Guide to Dating Someone Who is Codependent
Managing Codependency: Know the Signs
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